I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
