why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
