so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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