Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
