never play flip cup with pint glasses
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
