We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
