just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
