i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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