i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
now i know why i became what i already was.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
i need some magic done to my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize