if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
handjob tips. give me some.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
