Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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