Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Randomize