Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
