I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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