yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize