dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Are we still banned from the library?
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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