You really coming over, don't trick.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?