do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Me too!
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I'm sobbing to NWA
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
