can we get nightvision for the apartment?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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