u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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