He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
