I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
love makes seman taste better
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
