Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
