So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
