His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Randomize