is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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