The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
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