is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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