Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
