Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
