I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
