let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I wish i was in the wii world.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
