I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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