I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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