did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
