i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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