It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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