Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
smell my finger.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
