After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
