I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
