they need to just BURY HIM!
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
