I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
