And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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