I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize