Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
