So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
