just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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