You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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