I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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