Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
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Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
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