Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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